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By Rabbi Naftoly Bier
In Genesis chapter 34:1, it states, “ ”…ותצא דינה בת לאה “And Dinah the daughter of Leah went out to look among the daughters of the land.” She was subsequently defiled by Shechem.
Though she was truly righteous, the spirit of her father Yaakov Avinu internalized in her being, she made a slight mistake by leaving the confines of her family. This was a violation of her inherent trait of צניעות, Tznius, that is inherently part and parcel of every female.
What does צניעות mean? It’s been translated as modesty, humility, nobility, discretion, privacy… Let us examine passages in תנ“ך and the Talmud.
In Michah 6:8, it states: “והצנע לכת עם אלוקיך”, and one should walk with צניעות with Hashem.” The Talmud Tractate Makkos 24a, explains that this refers to the mitzvah of escorting a deceased to their burial and to be involved with the marriage of a bride. “If the prophet admonishes us to ask act with צניעות regarding public affairs, surely for mitzvos done in private.” This passage refers to two circumstances; one, that if one enables someone to be married with financial help, it should be done discreetly. Two, that if one rejoices at a wedding it should be done without frivolity. The common theme is the grave responsibility to preserve one’s dignity and nobility. The true source of one’s human greatness is the fact that one is created by Hashem and by internalizing this fact one will truly act in a manner that will be in accordance with the gift of being a צלם אלוקים, a person created to emulate Hashem.
צניעות is the dynamic of protecting one’s inner nobility. Yes, dress, act, speak and think accordingly!
When חוה was created by Hashem, on every bone that was created, He declared you should be a צנועה (מדרש רבה). Effectively, the female was entrusted to be the one who safeguards, protects and inculcates the human race with the true essential dignity that is part and parcel of all of us.
שלמה המלך , King Solomon, teaches “תורת חסד על לשונה”, the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” True dignity is when one recognizes that one possesses G-d-given dignity, one logically emulates Him in the most pronounced way; by being a giver. This is the meaning of the blessing שעשני כרצונו , I was made by Him like His will. His will is to give, Hashem bequeathed me with the same essence! What validation!
The גמרא מגילה יג: relates that the family of רחל, Rachel are exemplars of the trait of צניעות. In order that
her sister לאה, Leah should not be so embarrassed by their father לבן, Lavan, she taught her the codes, passwords that she and יעקב אבינו had developed, thereby saving her from ignobility. צניעות: protecting another’s dignity.
A descendant of Rachel, Shaul (HaMelech), when anointed to be king by שמואל הנביא , Shmuel the Prophet, didn’t even inform his own father. צניעות: protecting one’s dignity by not drawing attention to oneself.
Another descendant, אסתר המלכה, Queen Esther, when badgered by the king (אחשוורוש) to divulge her identity, pleaded “amnesia” – צניעות: to protect oneself – not to reveal oneself.
The common theme by all three, was the ability to restrain and suppress the normal reaction of the need to speak, to be heard by others and compare oneself to others. צניעות: control and dominance of one’s normal reactions, thereby maintaining the vision of one’s goals and aspirations and also enabling others to achieve the same.
רחל, Rachel, is the paragon. After waiting seven years to be married to Yaakov Avinu, she relinquished her dream in order that her sister shouldn’t be disgraced, shamed and ridiculed. This is the epitome of reverence of another’s nobility.
There are three mitzvos associated uniquely with women, נדה, חלה, and הדלקת הנר. When one fashions dough to make bread, the staple food – one has to give a portion to the כהן. The lesson: remember it is I, Hashem, who has benefited you with all – including bread, for all blessing is from me.
Shabbos is a time of transcendence from the mundane, from defining oneself by one’s creativity, thereby connecting once again, with one’s נשמה, soul – our inner identity. It’s heralded with the candle lighting by the woman.
טהרה – is the dynamic as explained by the Ramchal, as the ability to selflessly act solely to follow the dictates of Hashem and not to draw attention at all to oneself. נדה – to transcend the focus on the physical monthly change to creating a selfless loving bond with one’s spouse.
All these three are ramifications of protecting one’s nobility, that being that I am a subject of Hashem and therefore all one’s actions are defined by that ennobling relationship. They are entrusted to the woman, for she is the true embodiment and educator of צניעות, nobility.
